11-21-2018, 07:44 AM
AceArcher5532 asked me if I can share a my script with him. However, I can't send this person a private message because this was disabled for him/her AND I don't have a script.
However, I do have some changes and my story structure that I’ll share with you and maybe you'd like to share some of the changes you would make to the or my story, too.
Changes for A New Beginning:
Spyro knows he's a dragon- It just doesn't seem logical for him to think he's a dragonfly.
Spyro is younger than Sparx- In the game they're born on the same day to show they're “bond.” This never comes up again and I like the idea of Spyro being the little brother while also ironically being the “big” brother compared to Sparx who is the big brother, but is little. They can still be brothers, the same age thing feels unnecessary.
Spyro shouldn't learn all the elements in this story- Cynder stole the Guardians’ power, however are they even able to really teach Spyro? He also learns the elements way too quickly. Which as we’ve seen in Avatar the Last Airbender, this isn't the case. Furthermore, that story already exists. My solution to make the two stories feel less similar is to focus on Spyro learning fire. Sure I could show him practicing the elements in the next story, but with Spyro learning fire, it stays true to the original, offers opportunities to strengthen his bond with Ignitus, and give him an advantage over Malefor (with my telling Malefor wasn’t taught fire).
Cynder kills Sparx’s and Spyro’s dragonfly parents- This gives Sparx a real reason to hate Cynder and make that relationship difficult later and gives them a reason for both of them to head off on their journey as opposed to spyro just leaving on his own.
Make it clearer who Cynder is in relation to Spyro- Spyro has never known his real family. I don't quite understand where dragon eggs come from since there isn't any other female dragon in this series besides Cynder. But let's say, through some weird dragon culture la la la, that since Spyro and Cynder are part of the same clutch that they have throughout the story a brother/sister relationship instead of boyfriend/girlfriend.
In addition- do something more creative than Cynder flying through a sky portal. It's meh. Have Spyro be the only other dragon who can travel to convexity besides just Cynder and be able to get there by traveling through a dark crystal forrest or something other than a sky portal.
Of course there is more I would change, but these are just some ideas.
Story Structure for A New Beginning (it is still vague but you can see what I’m going for)
Beginning- The temple is attacked and Ignitus sends the egg down a river with a family of dragonflies to keep it safe and to call the dragon Spyro. Several years later, Spyro is feeling like an outcast among the dragonflies(i.e. Sparx’s father can't teach Spyro to fly)
Inciting incident- Sparx is captured and Spyro uses fire to free him. They also meet Ignitus who reveals to Spyro what it means to be the purple dragon. Ignitus can't teach him with all the apes looking for him, Spyro goes home.
Major Catastrophe 1- Before Spyro and Sparx return they find Cynder tearing apart the dragonfly village demanding the purple dragon be turned over. She kills their parents and they flee with Ignitus. Spyro learns to fly along the way.
First false epiphany- When they arrive at the temple Spyro and Ignitus bond over some fire training. Ignitus explains Cynder is a servant of malefor and they decide they need to gather the guardians to defeat Cynder.
Midpoint- After rescuing the first two guardians they discover that their power was drained into a dark crystal so they cannot defeat Cynder. Furthermore, Ignitus explains that Cynder is trying to free Malefor. Spyro decides he can stop Cynder.
Second false epiphany- Spyro tries to learn the other elements, but this proves useless since the elders can't train him that well without their powers. Sparx suggests a new plan to destroy the dark crystal that holds the guardians power. So they go alone find the last guardian while the others, including Ignitus stay behind.
Major Catastrophe 2- Cynder set up a trap letting the last guardian go without Spyro knowing. Ignitus discovers this and rushes to save them, but Cynder captures Ignitus. Spyro is depressed at the loss of his father figure.
Regrouping- Spyro plucks up the courage to go save Ignitus and the other guardians join Spyro to help save their friend. Ignitus is freed but Cynder escapes into a dark crystal archway where she can't be followed by the guardians. Ignitus reveals that Cynder is one of Spyro’s only surviving siblings and that she was corrupted by the dark master, furthermore that Spyro is the only one who can go in the crystal arch to stop Cynder because they share the same power. Spyro goes in to stop Cynder.
Climax- the dark crystal has already unlocked Malefor’s prison. Spyro fights her but it goes poorly for Spyro until he remembers his training with Ignitus. Some Ignitus had said will trigger Spyro’s deus ex machina power to free Cynder from Malefor’s control.
As convexity collapses on itself, Spyro decides to save Cynder and they all escape.
Ending- They return to the temple, Sparx says something funny, Ignitus and Spyro share a moment.
End tease- Cynder sits at the temple balcony at night looking to the sky. Spyro asks what if she's alright, but she remains distant and says nothing as she stares uneasily at the moons.
If you want clarification on anything, please tell me. This structure is sparse since I was quickly trying to get it out. You're probably wondering about what happens at Dante’s Freezer and Tall Plains. At Dante’s Freezer I want Spyro and Sparx to get into a bit of a fight as to how much they need each other so Sparx leaves Spyro in the midst of a blizzard but returns when he battles the ice king. As for Tall Plains I don't know but I can think of something. That's why I want a Netflix series (as stated in previous thread) because those places sound like they’d be one or two episodes per setting. Anyway, thanks for showing interest. I can't wait to read your thoughts on this.
However, I do have some changes and my story structure that I’ll share with you and maybe you'd like to share some of the changes you would make to the or my story, too.
Changes for A New Beginning:
Spyro knows he's a dragon- It just doesn't seem logical for him to think he's a dragonfly.
Spyro is younger than Sparx- In the game they're born on the same day to show they're “bond.” This never comes up again and I like the idea of Spyro being the little brother while also ironically being the “big” brother compared to Sparx who is the big brother, but is little. They can still be brothers, the same age thing feels unnecessary.
Spyro shouldn't learn all the elements in this story- Cynder stole the Guardians’ power, however are they even able to really teach Spyro? He also learns the elements way too quickly. Which as we’ve seen in Avatar the Last Airbender, this isn't the case. Furthermore, that story already exists. My solution to make the two stories feel less similar is to focus on Spyro learning fire. Sure I could show him practicing the elements in the next story, but with Spyro learning fire, it stays true to the original, offers opportunities to strengthen his bond with Ignitus, and give him an advantage over Malefor (with my telling Malefor wasn’t taught fire).
Cynder kills Sparx’s and Spyro’s dragonfly parents- This gives Sparx a real reason to hate Cynder and make that relationship difficult later and gives them a reason for both of them to head off on their journey as opposed to spyro just leaving on his own.
Make it clearer who Cynder is in relation to Spyro- Spyro has never known his real family. I don't quite understand where dragon eggs come from since there isn't any other female dragon in this series besides Cynder. But let's say, through some weird dragon culture la la la, that since Spyro and Cynder are part of the same clutch that they have throughout the story a brother/sister relationship instead of boyfriend/girlfriend.
In addition- do something more creative than Cynder flying through a sky portal. It's meh. Have Spyro be the only other dragon who can travel to convexity besides just Cynder and be able to get there by traveling through a dark crystal forrest or something other than a sky portal.
Of course there is more I would change, but these are just some ideas.
Story Structure for A New Beginning (it is still vague but you can see what I’m going for)
Beginning- The temple is attacked and Ignitus sends the egg down a river with a family of dragonflies to keep it safe and to call the dragon Spyro. Several years later, Spyro is feeling like an outcast among the dragonflies(i.e. Sparx’s father can't teach Spyro to fly)
Inciting incident- Sparx is captured and Spyro uses fire to free him. They also meet Ignitus who reveals to Spyro what it means to be the purple dragon. Ignitus can't teach him with all the apes looking for him, Spyro goes home.
Major Catastrophe 1- Before Spyro and Sparx return they find Cynder tearing apart the dragonfly village demanding the purple dragon be turned over. She kills their parents and they flee with Ignitus. Spyro learns to fly along the way.
First false epiphany- When they arrive at the temple Spyro and Ignitus bond over some fire training. Ignitus explains Cynder is a servant of malefor and they decide they need to gather the guardians to defeat Cynder.
Midpoint- After rescuing the first two guardians they discover that their power was drained into a dark crystal so they cannot defeat Cynder. Furthermore, Ignitus explains that Cynder is trying to free Malefor. Spyro decides he can stop Cynder.
Second false epiphany- Spyro tries to learn the other elements, but this proves useless since the elders can't train him that well without their powers. Sparx suggests a new plan to destroy the dark crystal that holds the guardians power. So they go alone find the last guardian while the others, including Ignitus stay behind.
Major Catastrophe 2- Cynder set up a trap letting the last guardian go without Spyro knowing. Ignitus discovers this and rushes to save them, but Cynder captures Ignitus. Spyro is depressed at the loss of his father figure.
Regrouping- Spyro plucks up the courage to go save Ignitus and the other guardians join Spyro to help save their friend. Ignitus is freed but Cynder escapes into a dark crystal archway where she can't be followed by the guardians. Ignitus reveals that Cynder is one of Spyro’s only surviving siblings and that she was corrupted by the dark master, furthermore that Spyro is the only one who can go in the crystal arch to stop Cynder because they share the same power. Spyro goes in to stop Cynder.
Climax- the dark crystal has already unlocked Malefor’s prison. Spyro fights her but it goes poorly for Spyro until he remembers his training with Ignitus. Some Ignitus had said will trigger Spyro’s deus ex machina power to free Cynder from Malefor’s control.
As convexity collapses on itself, Spyro decides to save Cynder and they all escape.
Ending- They return to the temple, Sparx says something funny, Ignitus and Spyro share a moment.
End tease- Cynder sits at the temple balcony at night looking to the sky. Spyro asks what if she's alright, but she remains distant and says nothing as she stares uneasily at the moons.
If you want clarification on anything, please tell me. This structure is sparse since I was quickly trying to get it out. You're probably wondering about what happens at Dante’s Freezer and Tall Plains. At Dante’s Freezer I want Spyro and Sparx to get into a bit of a fight as to how much they need each other so Sparx leaves Spyro in the midst of a blizzard but returns when he battles the ice king. As for Tall Plains I don't know but I can think of something. That's why I want a Netflix series (as stated in previous thread) because those places sound like they’d be one or two episodes per setting. Anyway, thanks for showing interest. I can't wait to read your thoughts on this.